Ode to என் வீடு
By Caris Gross ‘23, Lady Doak Fellow 2024-2026
Though the resumption of the fellowship to American College has meant there are once again two fellows in Madurai, the LDC fellow still practically works alone at their site. When I first arrived in Madurai, I could barely step outside my apartment without facing what felt like a thousand insurmountable challenges. I had no confidence in my ability to find my way in an unfamiliar city with unfamiliar people, and I certainly couldn’t imagine how this place could become home. 20 months later, I now call Madurai my home without hesitation, not because of my own efforts, but because of the kindness and welcoming nature of each person who has offered me a kind word or an invitation to their house. This story is a tribute to those who have made my two years incredibly special, who have made Madurai feel like என் வீடு – my home.
The ISC Team
I sit down every few weeks with the student leadership team of the International Study Centre (ISC) to plan our events for the month, ranging from film screenings, to safe space group discussions, to international holiday parties. Event scheduling can feel like whack-a-mole, trying to grab a date, time, and venue as soon as it becomes available, while juggling the cramped academic calendar. By the end of our meetings, with a semi-finalized list of events, we’re often halfway out of our chairs and collapsed onto the floor. With official business settled, our real fun begins. We order our usual KFC haul – chicken popcorn, fries, and tandoori mayo dip instead of the normal sambar rice sent from home – pass the spread around, and debrief class frustrations, the limbo of highly anticipated film releases, and impending graduations and internships.
These three students, the President, Vice-President, and Secretary of the ISC club, apply for their positions and are selected by the ISC staff at the start of the academic year. They are unbelievably resourceful and creative, and they show up every time I ask them to, often anticipating my needs or taking over when they see me stressed for unnecessary reasons. In March, when I was away for a few days for a medical emergency, I came back to find our end-of-year Prom Night completely planned. Invitations were sent, decorations were hung, and the playlist was finished. All I needed to do was show up.
I have a unique relationship with my students; I’m not their teacher, but I’m not their peer either. Instead, I am a friend, mentor, confidant, advisor, English practice partner, and surprise speaker of Tamil. I’ve met their parents, gone to their homes for holidays, tried new restaurants with them, and taught a few how to bowl. I introduce them to professional working environments and encourage their leadership skills, but above all, we have as much fun as possible.
Wrapping up the 2024-25 year at prom night
Bowling with the ISC President
Happy Holidays from the 2024-25 student team!
Premila Paul
At the annual Madurai Cotton Fabric Expo last year, Dr. Premila Paul negotiated the cost of a cotton saree that caught my eye down to half its stated price. This year, I braved the expo on my own, and tried to emulate her confident haggling style. When I caught her up on my successful purchases, she called me a “smartie” for my attempts, among other kind words. A former faculty member of both Lady Doak College and American College and current director of the Study Centre for Indian Literature in English and Translation (SCILET), Dr. Premila’s resume is extensive and her roots with Shansi run deep. She welcomes fellows into her life as family, and her affectionate sharp humor has resulted in some of my hardest laughs in Madurai. While I was a “smartie” for my market navigation, I’m a “troublemaker” to her most days. The name is usually accompanied by a tight hug, so I embrace it fully.
Introducing my parents to Dr. Premila, SCILET, and Madurai
Wearing the cotton saree in question to a friend’s wedding
Iniyaa, Kayal, Muthu, and my TTS Dance Team
After a few months of telling myself I would start going, I became a weekly attendee at a freestyle dance class at a studio ten minutes away after the summer break. Once my new dance teacher, Muthu, found out why I was in Madurai, he excitedly pulled up photos of himself dancing alongside Stephanie Mora Hernández, 2013-15 Lady Doak fellow. I was immediately welcomed into the group of dancers, my first real immersion in a group completely separate from both Lady Doak and American College. My new friends explained their jokes to make sure I could keep up with their rapid Tamil conversation, and drove me home every day so I didn’t have to catch an auto. I quickly found myself in rehearsals for the annual studio-wide show, and when my exam season trip to Japan and South Korea forced me to miss several practice sessions, the team set up an extra rehearsal in the week leading up to the show to make sure I was filled in on the choreography. Months later, I still feel like I’m riding the high of our final performance, a 6-minute long compilation of Vijay’s biggest hits in anticipation of his final movie. We all shared a hug at the end, and more than a few tears were shed at the realization that we had finished for the year and our group was splitting up. A few of us play pickleball and watch Formula One races together on the weekends.
Dinner with my fellow dancers
Mid-performance to Kannum Kannudhan
The sweaty post-performance high
Christy
My friend Christy left her teaching position at Lady Doak at the end of my first year to move back home. Though I’ve missed seeing her every day on campus, I’ve frequently accepted her invitations to come home. The first time I visited, she drove me out towards the hills for a glass of the best lemon tea in the area, then we stood and drank slowly while watching the sunset. Her family feels like mine; her sister paints my nails and her brother picks me up from the bus stand. After I shared the video of my dance performance, I received a voice message from Christy’s amma (mother) calling my dance skills superb. The night before her wedding, Christy and I laid awake whispering about what the next few weeks might look like, trying not to wake up her cousins all around us. She always tells me to speak more Tamil, which I try my best to do.
Lemon tea sunset in Vatlagundu
Nighttime outing with Christy and siblings
The India Fellows
India fellows Donnie Harris, Sophie Bernstein, and Olive Badrinath have seen me through more medical woes than I can count. After an unexpected outpatient surgery in Madurai, I moved in as Donnie’s roommate for a week to be fed and cared for. During celebrations for Pongal, a Tamil harvest festival in January, I hit my head stepping down from the bus, resulting in a concussion. Instead of laying alone at home, Sophie welcomed me to their home in the hills for my first few days of recovery. When I injured my back a week before my long-awaited dance performance, Olive sat with me in the hospital waiting room as I was juggled between doctors. Co-fellows are many things to each other (emergency contacts, city guides, and Tamil classmates, to name a few), but especially a reminder of comfort from home, when life in India can feel just a tad overwhelming. I feel blessed to have shared many plates of dosa, many cups of tea, and many days of companionship with each of them.
Sophie touring me around the Keystone Foundation campus
Donnie and I showing off our custom matching shirts (a new co-fellow tradition)
Strong Olive at the SCILET Creative Writing Workshop in Kodaikanal
Vasavi
My friend Vasavi splits her time between LDC and research for her PhD in Chennai. Whenever she’s on campus, we stick together like peas in a pod, sharing mushroom biryani outside the faculty mess on Saturday afternoons and heading to the mall to watch movies of high entertainment value but low quality. She takes me around town to various monuments and temples, and I try to absorb as much as I can from her about the history of the city we live in. Our overlapping weekends are rare; we’ve been attempting to climb Yanaimalai (a hill near Madurai, named elephant hill for its elephant-like appearance) for nearly a year, but we’ve yet to make the trek. Between unseasonable monsoon showers and early summer heat waves, it may not happen before my departure, but it gives me another reason to come back and visit her.
Climbing up to the Jain caves with Vasavi
Celebrating my 25th birthday with Vasavi
Two years have passed in the blink of an eye, but I will treasure these friendships for years and years to come. They will call me back to Madurai, or across the world to wherever they land. The easiest answer that any Shansi fellow can give about what they’ll miss most about their two years is the people. I will never be able to fully express my gratitude to all of them for their presence in my life, but I will keep trying for as long as I can in all of the languages I know. Here’s to new friends and family – may we meet again often for meals, chats, and long, meandering walks. Thank you!
From the first year of Model United Nations…
…to the second! Making it through these adventures a little older and a little wiser.